This is not a fun post to write but this has been so heavy on my heart for two days. Something happened to me Tuesday night that will affect me for the rest of my time on earth. While on Facebook a picture of animal cruelty like I could never have imagined scrolled past. The only way I can see these pictures is if a friend posts them. And I have a couple friends who will. You can block those sites from ever showing up on your feed again. So I thought I was safe. What I saw Tuesday night will haunt me forever. And for that reason I am leaving Facebook.
God admonishes us to protect our eyes. When we think of this we generally go to evil visuals, like pornography. Bad television programs etc. But after what I saw and how I still feel at this moment almost three days later I think He means more than just the obvious.
Psalm 101:3 says- I will set no wicked thing before mine eyes.......
Proverbs 23:26 - My son, give me thine heart, and let thine eyes observe my ways.
There are many verses that speak of the eyes but these seemed most appropriate. When I saw that picture my heart began to race. I could feel it pounding, almost like it was going to leave my chest and fall to the floor. My breathing quickened and my mind flew here and there...how could that animal have survived what happened to it? Please Lord let it have been shot the second after the picture was taken. What kind of person does that? Is there a special hell for poachers? For anyone who harms an animal? It was well over an hour before my heart was beating normal again. But my mind was not back. You see, I don't just see something then slowly forget about it a week or month later. I dwell, question, revisit... over and over and over. I beg God to remove it from my memory but somehow that never happens. I know it never happens because while I may not see that picture every second of every day I will tell you each time I see an elephant that picture will lunge to the forefront of my mind. Clear as a bell as plain as day. I will never be able to look at a horse with his head tucked into his body again without the picture of the suffering they go through to get that pose. I will never look at a wire pet kennel without seeing the two starving dogs that had been abandoned in them. My list could go on and on. Years ago I had Craig delete Animal Planet from our line-up for fear that I might land on that channel and see something I would never forget.
The next day my mood was dark. I felt a depression and ugliness. Today has been some better. I still feel the darkness. The loss of innocence. Hopefully tomorrow is even better. Isaiah 26:3 says - Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on thee.....I desperately need that perfect peace right now!
My last Facebook post was asking why. Why post the pictures? We all know there is cruelty out there. That doesn't mean we need to see it. We all know where we can donate to help end it. That doesn't mean we need to see it. What if Liam had been looking over my shoulder? He often does. He would have noticed, he notices everything. He would have questioned. I know at that moment I would not have been able to open my mouth without tears pouring from my eyes. How would he have handled that? How would I have explained to him what he saw? At four years old I want him to know only goodness for a while longer. Life will happen fast enough.
Matthew 6:22 says - The light of the body is the eye (another version called the light, lamp) if therefore thine eye be single (clear), the whole body shall be full of light.
I want only good things, safe things to come into my body through my eyes. I want my body full of light, not darkness. And because I feel that I need to protect my eyes and mind from pictures that disturb me then Facebook is not the place for me.
It is wonderful to know that God is my perfect peace. That I have Him to fall back on. That He loves all His creation and I firmly believe this elephant will be restored in heaven. That all that have suffered will be restored. That belief makes this the tiniest bit easier to handle.
God admonishes us to protect our eyes. When we think of this we generally go to evil visuals, like pornography. Bad television programs etc. But after what I saw and how I still feel at this moment almost three days later I think He means more than just the obvious.
Psalm 101:3 says- I will set no wicked thing before mine eyes.......
Proverbs 23:26 - My son, give me thine heart, and let thine eyes observe my ways.
There are many verses that speak of the eyes but these seemed most appropriate. When I saw that picture my heart began to race. I could feel it pounding, almost like it was going to leave my chest and fall to the floor. My breathing quickened and my mind flew here and there...how could that animal have survived what happened to it? Please Lord let it have been shot the second after the picture was taken. What kind of person does that? Is there a special hell for poachers? For anyone who harms an animal? It was well over an hour before my heart was beating normal again. But my mind was not back. You see, I don't just see something then slowly forget about it a week or month later. I dwell, question, revisit... over and over and over. I beg God to remove it from my memory but somehow that never happens. I know it never happens because while I may not see that picture every second of every day I will tell you each time I see an elephant that picture will lunge to the forefront of my mind. Clear as a bell as plain as day. I will never be able to look at a horse with his head tucked into his body again without the picture of the suffering they go through to get that pose. I will never look at a wire pet kennel without seeing the two starving dogs that had been abandoned in them. My list could go on and on. Years ago I had Craig delete Animal Planet from our line-up for fear that I might land on that channel and see something I would never forget.
The next day my mood was dark. I felt a depression and ugliness. Today has been some better. I still feel the darkness. The loss of innocence. Hopefully tomorrow is even better. Isaiah 26:3 says - Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on thee.....I desperately need that perfect peace right now!
My last Facebook post was asking why. Why post the pictures? We all know there is cruelty out there. That doesn't mean we need to see it. We all know where we can donate to help end it. That doesn't mean we need to see it. What if Liam had been looking over my shoulder? He often does. He would have noticed, he notices everything. He would have questioned. I know at that moment I would not have been able to open my mouth without tears pouring from my eyes. How would he have handled that? How would I have explained to him what he saw? At four years old I want him to know only goodness for a while longer. Life will happen fast enough.
Matthew 6:22 says - The light of the body is the eye (another version called the light, lamp) if therefore thine eye be single (clear), the whole body shall be full of light.
I want only good things, safe things to come into my body through my eyes. I want my body full of light, not darkness. And because I feel that I need to protect my eyes and mind from pictures that disturb me then Facebook is not the place for me.
It is wonderful to know that God is my perfect peace. That I have Him to fall back on. That He loves all His creation and I firmly believe this elephant will be restored in heaven. That all that have suffered will be restored. That belief makes this the tiniest bit easier to handle.